Tuesday January 15th

Another (Spring) Internship!

My stomach was in knots

  • I waited for the final phone-call (after months of interviewing) on Jan 9th. I answered nervously and slumped over, awaiting the voice on the other end’s message of “unfortunately…we decided…”. I could already feel a large shadow of myself towering over my body. I decided that I’d sit by the window of the bus and cry on the way home to get over my rejection.

  • This was not the day for that. I received good news that I will be receiving an offer for a Spring internship. They picked me. I’m puzzled, but say yes. First I’m sitting on the couch. By the end of the phone call, I am doing a signature happy dance, barely holding the phone. Did I remember to put my shoes back on? Will my phone battery on my flip-phone die before the voice on the other end hangs up? That would be super awkward.

  • I am finalizing everything and figuring out how and when to tie up some other loose ends local to LA before heading out. I will have to move soon. It will also give me the opportunity to look for housing for my Summer internship, which I uh..haven’t really started looking for yet. I’ve sort of thought about a lot of things, but not fully, which is exciting because things that you don’t plan that fail horribly because you didn’t plan for them are mini-adventures and mini-tests of your patience! :D

  • Most of all, I’m really excited for the mentorship and the opportunity. My team makes me so happy. So much of it feels like such a fit in a way I can’t explain. I am happy for the opportunity to grow and broaden my skills, as well as grow as a person. I’m excited to be in a place of people just like me. So I won’t feel as lonely (in my thoughts about certain things I’m passionate about) anymore. I won’t have to live through the internet alone anymore.

  • Unfortunately, I will also not be able to speak about this opportunity in detail, but I believe that my growth will become self-evident. It will be a fruitful experience.

LA is a strange place

  • I joke often that there is force like the heliopause; it has kept me here for so long that I could not break through. I could not break beyond the black hole of LA and the limited opportunities for growth. This year is different.

The Bay area is my space

  • Something resonates with me about the people and the place. I love it in a way I can’t explain. It energizes me. I have so many friends there, and I’ve received thoughtful mentorship there. I’ve grown so much from my experiences there.

My birthday

  • I’ll be celebrating my birthday over there. I’m excited about that. I haven’t thought about what I’ll be doing, but it might start with an H and end with an L (clue: seven letters) :D


  • One of my really good friends in LA is experiencing a bit of heartbreak because of me. I’ve moved around so much in the US, that I think it doesn’t affect me as much anymore, but I’m also terrible at goodbyes. I’d like to think that everyone I’ve touched (and who has touched me) will forever stay positively with me as I move forward to the next adventure. I can’t hope for too much more than that.

That’s about all I have to say for now

  • I’ve been staying up to get work done, and have a bit of a flu at the moment. I may also check out a talk on Randomization if I’m up for it tomorrow evening.

And that’s about it

Written on January 15, 2019